Wednesday, July 20, 2011

TOB Tuesd- um Wednesdays! TOB and Same-sex 'Marriage' or Would you serve 10W30 or 10W40 With Veal?

So last week, I addressed Theology of the Body and marriage. As an addendum, I guess, I feel it is important to talk about Same-sex 'marriage' in regard to TOB. To be succinct as possible, it simply cannot and does not exist.
According to God's plan for marriage in the bible, it must have four elements.

Marriage must be free, total, faithful and fruitful.

If you think about it, same-sex 'marriage' is not free since it is based on a compulsion toward distorted sexual desires. It is not total in that one is really not giving anything of himself, sexually speaking, to the other person. It obviously is not fruitful, as a same-sex couple cannot produce offspring. I know that technology has provided an illusion of this, but biologically, as our bodies are designed, it is impossible. And although these relationships may be faithful with regard to fidelity, since they are based on selfish and distorted sexual desires, the role of the other partner could be filled by anyone. Without the possibility of children there is nothing to tie the two together by singular roles within the family.

I know that some people will say that it is about the love that the two people share and not just about intercourse. As I mentioned in my marriage post, the major difference between friendship and marriage, is the marital union of the bodies into 'one flesh'. It is sexuality. And the meaning and purpose of sex is to point us toward our spiritual union with God. It is to be an unselfish exchange of total persons in a life-giving union. By that definition, the only true definition, members of the same sex cannot even truly have intercourse. When those desires are turned toward nothing more than physical satisfaction, they become by nature, selfish and twisted in on oneself. This is the case with addiction to pornography and masturbation. So by that definition, when two people of the same gender have 'sex' it is really no more than mutual masturbation.

I am sure that these statements are going to cause some controversy, and possibly lose me some friends, but in the end, I can only express what I know as truth. And I know there are many arguments that people will make for same-sex 'marriage' but those do not change the reality that marriage began as a religious institution that the state decided to recognize (and charge licensure fees for). That does not, inherently, give 'the state' the right to re-define the reality of what a marriage is. (Perhaps they got cocky when the re-defined murder as 'choice').
More importantly to me, marriage, by my faith, is not just a legal contract, it is a covenant, a sacrament, a sacred calling, a vocation. People will say I don't have the right to 'impose my will' upon others, and thanks to the system we live under that is correct and a wonderful thing. That does not mean that I cannot voice my dissent when somebody tries to twist something that is important to me into what it is not because they think they have a right to it.

Again, many will disagree with me, and legislatures will do what they will do (generally what is politically expedient to bring in money or save their jobs) but no matter what the state says marriage is, it does not change the reality. In the end, it is one woman and one man, brought together to share in God's miracle of creation. What I've written here are my beliefs based on what I have learned marriage is. I have friends that will agree, and I have friends that will disagree. When it comes down to it, we all have one voice. I hope we can express ourselves civilly, and if we disagree, we can at least learn about the views on the other side.

I don't want people to think that I am unfeeling about those with same-sex attraction, by the way. I cannot imagine the struggle they go through each day if they are fighting those desires and I do not envy their call either. We are all called to chastity, even within marriage (chastity- a call toward purity of heart) but for those with same-sex attraction, the call to chastity is a call to celibacy. In it, there is opportunity to give the gift of oneself in other ways, but it has to be a very difficult call. Most of the people with these desires have been told by our new modern society that it is okay to act upon them and that it is okay to use their sexuality this way. These people probably do not agonize over a desire to live chastely. It is their choice and some may say it is not loving of me to point out that it is the wrong choice. But if your neighbor was doing something against the body's original design, such as, drinking motor oil, wouldn't it be the loving thing for you to inform him that 10W30 is not good for the digestive tract? I know the analogy is a bit different as there are certain and immediate consequences to drinking motor oil, but in the end, it is basically just stating that someone is not using their body as it was intended. And if your neighbor, after you tell him, continues chugging 10W30, then you love him anyway and help him when he gets sick.

Thank you for reading this far.

God bless,

P.D.O.

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